Sorry I'm Not A Good Leader...

I'm so sorry,
I'm dumb.
I'm not a good leader.
I don't know how to lead.
Hundreds of sorry,
We are moving too slow.
To my Props team members for Macbeth.
It's going to be a crap.
We are going to borrow seniors props,
Which I think is going to affect our marks.
I didn't consult the lecturers,
Because I know they are going to alter this and that.
I know, we trusts ourselves right?
We know we are able to do things right, right?
But the lecturers and friends didn't notice that.
I am seriously sad, 
I hate it to be a leader.
Firstly, I want to act.
It's so happen that during the day of audition,
I was on leave.
I was sick.
So they put me under Props Committee.
Is it fair?
Then, during the meeting,
My classmates suggested my name to be a leader.
I declined, said that I was busy.
But they insisted, said that Macbeth is an assignment.
I agreed, bitterly, though they forced me.
Is it fair?
Now this morning,
My classmates scolded me,
The way she say it,
Like our team did nothing.
Yeah, I agree.
We were too busy,
Language Camp, Language Week.
It was hectic, yet pathetic.
I am so sad.
I said to Mr Mano,
That I don't want to be a Props leader anymore.
He said nothing, and keep on asking.
I am sick, of doing things I hate!
I want to act!
Honestly,
I hate to do props,
And then to be a leader?
What the H**l?
The world is unfair.
I hope that Macbeth will be a failure.
I am sorry.
But can we have more time?
Can we be excluded from other stupid stuffs?
Can we just focus on our work?
Dear God, listen to me.
I am so sick right now.
I am tired of living like this.
Honestly, I want to go back.
Think that I don't belong here.
I had lots of troubles here,
With the seniors, friends.
I think I'm having mental illness now.
I'm going crazy if I'm not treated.
Dear God, listen to me.
I need a human friend.
I need support.
I want to cry now.
Please help me.
Will you?